Got the moves

This week I’ve realised you can live with only four pairs of shoes and ten items of clothing and you can survive without a fridge freezer and even without a bed (woes of old narrow curvy stairs and metal large double bed bases!).

I’m almost at my new home. Almost! Inbetween I have a temporary base in Llangollen.  So my move is 75% there and I can’t quite believe I’ve done it. This is the first time, bar some traveling, that I’ve ever lived in a town!!! I walk around and say to myself.. ooo there’s a florist and a hairdressers and a restaurant and a book shop and a cafe… like I’ve never been here before!!

It was a wrench leaving my lovely village but I’ve so many friends and family that I’ll be a happy frequent visitor. 

I’ve started my new morning’s walking along the beautiful singing  river Dee, spotting herons to the backdrop of the steam train or walks along the canal taking in the colourful boats that are homes calmly bobbing on the water.

Coincidentally it’s International Eisteddfod week and I was lucky to peek through on my early walk into the colouful field yet to be opened to the crowds.
Nearby I spotted this quote by Dylan Thomas and was quite blown away by it to be honest.

“Are you surprised that people can still dance and sing in a world on it’s head? The only surprising thing about miracles, however small, is that they sometimes happen”

Now more than ever it feels that we have to concentrate on what brings us together than what drives us apart. Singing and dancing might not heal the world entirely but it’s a good place to start. 

I find out through reading on my walk that the Eisteddod was brought about in 1947 for post ‘war weary’ people. To bring international communities together in one small town and show the ‘Welsh way’ .. that those communities can not only live side by side but they can also sing and dance and laugh and love.

Llangollen. We’re off to a good start.

Hope you’ve had a good week too.

Happy Sunday xx

Shut up?!

I was reading an article about a woman who writes a popular blog yesterday. She talked about the fact it came with the territory that because she writes publicly she’s also abused and ridiculed on occasion. Shame isn’t it? No wonder so many people say to me they wish they could write but they feel they can’t. Of course they could. 

Everyone has something to say but the problem is … can you get over the difficulties.  Are you prepared for someone to throw a comment back at you that you wrote 6 years  ago!?  I am. But it can be difficult.  

Write about being a positive person… .. then dare to feel down for a few minutes and you may well get someone questioning you about it! I tend to respond with. .. I’m human!! Just like you!

Anyway the point is this kind of attack is designed to take our voice away. Particularly women’s voices. How many fear to voice an opinion on Facebook or Twitter or even real life because you could be ridiculed or you feel a thousand eye rolls ? How many want to write but can’t because they think they’re not good enough.  How many are worried of the reaction from others?
I say be comfortable in your skin and confident about what you have to say.


Say it. 
Write about it. 
Talk it!
Particularly women. Women need to.. not shut up!

 

If you write a blog about parenting and it’s joys it doesn’t mean you won’t feel like locking yourself in your bathroom for 4 days because you just want some peace! if you’re passionate about being healthy and then find yourself tempted by a cream horn (oo remember them – are they still going?) ….then that’s because you’re human!

I’m not sure if this makes sense but I’m more aware and have experienced the lows and fortunately the highs of writing or voicing  an opinion.  I suppose what I’m saying is I’d like to try and encourage you to have yours. 
Stand up and be proud of what you’ve got to say.  You’ll never be remembered for being quiet!!

Happy happy Sunday.  it’s lovely to be back properly xx

Wandering mind

This sounds dramatic.  It is.  This week. It’s kind of been life changing.  Not in a huge ‘I’ve had an epiphany’ kind of way.  In lots of small ways. In ways that could only have happened because I had time for my mind.  To wander.

I’ve realised how very important that is.

I spent five days in a well worn and well loved motor home (not mine I hasten to add… unfortunately!). In a field. Next to the beach. In Wales.  Apart from the visit from the proud red and cheeky Robin and some chats with Tilly the three legged jack Russell  (and her owners!) there wasn’t a lot going on. Perfect.

With my mind free of work and clocks and what to cook and where do I fit in exercise and self criticism over what I’ve drank or how little sleep I’ve had or who I haven’t seen or why the house is a mess.  It was free of wondering whether I could shave 2 minutes off my drive to work or whether I felt guilty for leaving late.  Free of 6am alarms and snatched lunches.  Free of time holding me, instead I was holding time.

It wasn’t just about relaxing, it was about the fact that sometimes there wasn’t a lot ‘to do’.  It means I stared for many minutes at one cryptic crossword determined that I could get it (I got three in the I- a record!).  It meant that I watched a film I wanted to see for a while (The Hundred Foot Journey – Helen Mirren is in it, it’s about food and it’s set in France, what’s not to love!).   It means my walks could go on for hours.  It also meant at times I stared out of the top window in the motor home and looked out at the sparse but brilliantly green hills with an occasional sheep munching grass while admiring the top of the sea bouncing on the horizon.

I watched a sheep!!!!!

So, I didn’t just watch a sheep.  I kept having ‘ideas’.  I’m not the  most artistic person in the world or the most creative, I’m not the best cook or photographer or writer but I love doing it and shouldn’t we do more of what we love?  At long last that note book that I keep in my bag got some use (it’s there for ‘ideas’) and I found myself scribbling, I wrote two articles and my mind bounced from spending time in my VW van with my pooch and sausage dog (I don’t yet have sausage dog or the VW van but I will!)… to selling potatoes from my garden outside in brown bags to neighbours.  I don’t grow potatoes and my garden looks like monkeys have had a riot in it but……. it could happen!

I want to be daring  (I’m not) and (an occasional) risk taker (not there yet). I want to try something, take up a  new hobby (I know what that is – watch this space!). 

I want to say yes when I usually say no.

Putting this into practice as we sat on the beach hiding from the elements in a warm jumper, the sun stayed stubbornly and firmly behind the busy clouds, I was beckoned to get into the ice cold sea.  No thanks I said.  I sat and watched.

What am I doing watching I thought!  Feeling brave I rushed towards the white broth disappearing around my feet. It was freezing! My whole body was saying no, yet I felt excited, I was saying yes.  It took a few minutes to submerge myself totally  and lift my feet away from the sand allowing the salty water to carry me, for my arms to swim gently. There was only two people brave enough to brave the sea  and I was one of them!

I know this blog is a bit me me me this week but I’m excited about so many things.  One  thing I’ve decided is to share my creative juices on my blog and hopefully with you too!  .  Amateur pics, attempts at exercise, good and bad recipes, thrifty hints, lifestyle, recycle and upcycling, favourite books, magazines and bargains…. ….and of course my Sunday morning blog!

Hope you’ll enjoy the extra bits! Follow me on my DearMs website if you want email updates so you don’t miss any!  Or if you don’t want any extra emails you can unfollow me too! I hope you don’t!

It’s amazing what some time away does for us.   Make sure you get your 5 mins, 5 hours or maybe even 5 days to yourself too.  Not only will you feel better but you’ll feel better about everyone around you too!

Let your mind wander xx xx

Happy Sunday 🙂

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Justifying yourself?

Hi it’s just me. I’m just writing my blog.

I’m on a mission.

To remove the word just from my vocabulary.  Read that first sentence again. I sound apologetic and a bit pathetic.  This time I’ll write the sentence again, without the offending word…..Hi it’s me, I’m writing my blog!

So different!!

Along with eliminating the word sorry  (unless it’s actually warranted of course), this has been quite a feat. 

I stopped saying sorry, for purely existing, about 10 years ago.  You’ll notice now how many times you say sorry.  For absolutely no reason, for example,  I used to say it when people knocked into me in the street! Sorry (that you weren’t looking where you were going!).

I was always saying sorry.  I’d walk in a room … Sorry, do you have a pen? Sorry, can I use the phone? Sorry, can you pass me the pepper? Sorry, have you finished with that?

Sound familiar?

I’ve almost stopped doing it. Now I  notice how often so many others are apologising. All the time.

Just has been a bit more of a challenge.  During my spell checking of work emails I also now have to go back and remove the words just. 

Generally and surprisingly  there are about four apologetic ‘just’ words in every email!! Shocking.  I was writing a very serious email the other day and when I reviewed it before sending I found…. Hello, I just wanted to…. I just feel…..I just thought …..argh!! Take the word just out and I’m appearing stronger and more confident.

I’m not sure where this apologetic nonsense began. I notice it far far more in women which is probably no surprise.  Most of us have been apologising since we (just) left the womb.

So. In an aim to take small steps in feeling more confident, assured and more importantly less apologetic for simply breathing, maybe try it.  It honestly make you feel more positive and less… well…. just sorry!

Stop apologising for being the brilliant person you are!

Happy Sunday everyone xx

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Ps. Upon reviewing this blog I had to delete the word just two times!!

New year, new you?

Like many people as the clocks struck 12. As Jools sang at his hootenanny. As the fireworks cast a glow. As strangers kissed. The beginning of 2016. I too mentally began to think about what I’d change this year. I too like many people found myself annoyed as I failed a few days later.  I fell of the self-love writing blog that I’d promised to commit to after only a few days.

At the same time I smile and feel part of the ‘trying’ crowd as I see various posts on Facebook confirming that I’m not the only ‘failure’.  Most are friends attempting ‘dry’ January.  Within days of hopeful tee total promises and fruit tea drinking there are cheery photos with plum coloured wine glistening in large glasses scattering my timeline.  ‘Well it is a Friday’ says one.  Some are back on the cigarettes.  Others are bathing themselves in their forbidden chocolate. Some already know the money they spent on  gym membership may as well have been spent on the wine they’re going to drink any way.

I know why they don’t work. I think.  It’s simple.  We are forcing something on ourselves.  Unless you want to do it.  You won’t.  Smoking, drinking , eating, exercise. If you don’t really want to. It’s not going to happen long-term.   You’ve got to want it.

I found forcing myself to write every day made it feel like a job instead of something I love.  So I stopped.  I berated myself and felt like I’d let others down but I got over it after a day or so. I then felt relieved. 

Instead what I’ve decided to do  this year is to have a ‘theme’. This year it’ll be creativity.  Not only do I want to write here I want to write more.  I want to make all the cards that I’ll send. I want to cook new things and make ‘stuff’. I might knit or crochet or sew. I’m going to read more so my mind becomes more creative.  A theme seems a much better way to approach the new year. It has ambiguous potential without pressure to perform. 

So whatever you decide for 2016 whether it be to change nothing,  to  change something,  or perhaps even to take on your own theme…do it with passion,  don’t be hard on yourself if it doesn’t work out, try something else or just accept who you wonderfully are in the first place.

Happy 2016. I’m off to have a Sauvignon. Cheers x

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