I’m inbetween both of my children’s birthdays and like many parents these important days give me time to reflect on my parenting.
Have I been too soft? Spoilt them? Not pushed them enough? Done too much for them? Been around enough? Taught them life skills? Encouraged them to be decent human beings? Opened up their minds?
The best ‘job’ in the world. And the toughest. And the hardest. And the most worrying. And the one that brings out love from your heart that you didn’t know was there that makes anything tough about it insignificant.
As they get older one thing I love is learning from them.
I realised this week despite thinking I’m positive about life I can be seen as someone who is tired and… well… grumpy… about work in particular. I realised that I come home with stories less than flattering about going out to work because I’m focussing on the difficult bits and because of that I’ve made daily life sound sometimes like a bit of a drudgery.
It was a bit of a shock.
I’ve realised what I’ve done. It’s what a lot of us do. The stuff we talk about or relay back that day are the things that stand out. More often the negative stuff about how busy we are or how tired we are or how someone was shouting or how badly someone was driving or how rough the weather is or how annoying a colleague is or how that meeting was dull or .. how tired I am (again).
We don’t often come home and talk about the less noticable parts of our day. I don’t tend to talk about those things. A great piece of music playing on the way to work, the fabulous mountains of scenery that I pass, the thank you cards received and cakes of gratitude for a service from the surgery, the smiles from colleagues and happy tales from their weekend, the comparison and sharing of recipes at the lunch table, the giggles shared from one desk to another, the arrival of a new baby, the talk of a visit to family far away, the tales of wedding planning, the tender support shown through tough times, the hugs, the party planning, the sharing of photos of usually… our dogs or most likely…. our kids!
It reminded me how easy it can be to focus on the negative stuff and we can forgot all the good things happening because they’re almost incidental. For some reason we have some kind of obsession with bad news. Just look at the tv, the newspapers and even social media. It’s not about getting away from those truths but equally some of the nicer stuff should be our headlines too.
Happy Sunday x x x