Friday night was special to me and epitomizes what family is.
Most of us are no longer part of the 2.4 white picket fence brigade and if you’ve ever been the one that stepped out of that comfort zone you’ll know it’s a tough journey. People aren’t generally sympathetic to decisions that mean comfortable normality has been broken.
Whispers about what this will do to the children and rolled eyes that last many years telling you without words you’ll be sorry bore into your back. Single parents still, I feel, are treated as somewhat second class when it comes to the ideal family.
It means you always have to try harder. It means when your children do something perfectly normal like have a toddler tantrum or get into trouble at school you’ll feel at fault because you did this, you’re the single parent. You feel judged. Always.
On Friday I popped in to see my son at his dads. It didn’t start off well as there was an unfortunate dog poo incident which found me saying sorry a lot and ended with me on my hands and knees with Ecover trying to get it out of the white rug.
Ex wasn’t best pleased. He went off to the park and his little one wanted me to come too. I adore that! This little unrelated person belonging to my ex loves me. After a chat with my son I followed on to the park where football, scooters and a chat with ex on the bench ensued then his lovely wife turns up and I have a second of thinking is this weird for her that she arrives from work to her husband with his ex sitting on the bench. But no. I know it isn’t.
Anyway one conversation led to another which basically meant we all spent Friday night together at mine with wine, cheese and chip wraps with garlic mayo (divine), angel cake, cider, long conversations, special one to ones, dogs chasing balls, cheering on Mo at the athletics, the occasional tear and lots of laughter.
What’s a family?
That’s it isn’t it. It can be any shape. The most important aspect is that your family…. be it with cats and dogs or a partner or with ten children or none…. is your comfort blanket. A warm place of imperfections and love.
Happy Sunday xxx